I was recently asked by a close friend to explain exactly what it means when a husband plays with his wedding ring.
I don’t want to give the person’s name away for personal reasons, so I’ll just call her Misses Y.
Misses Y has been in married for five years. For most of that time the marriage has been positive. Sure, there have been the odd rocky moments. But let’s face it, which marriage doesn’t have it’s ups and downs? It’s human nature that no marriage will be perfect 100% of the time.
Recently, however, Misses Y’s husband has been staying “at work late.” This is new behaviour for him. He usually finishes work at 5 o’clock on the dot. He hasn’t been promoted or anything like that, so why is he suddenly staying out so late? It’s happening often too.
Misses Y has asked her husband about this. He says, of course, that he has lots of work to do and always finds excuses to justify his actions.
But then, a couple of weeks ago, Misses Y found a suspicious text message that said, “Can’t wait to see you,” and was signed by Jen. When Misses Y asked her husband about this, he started fidgeting with his wedding ring.
It was this incident that sparked Misses Y to ask me the question I am often asked. . .
What does it mean when a man plays with his wedding ring?
Misses Y had read in books that playing with the wedding ring shows that a man wants to leave a marriage. Was she heading for a divorce? Misses Y was very worried. I, on the other hand, wasn’t worried for her. I was very angry, but not worried.
The reason why I was angry is this: pop “body language specialists” have a terrible habit of dramatising body language. They make you believe that you’re heading for a divorce because your husband tapped his hand on a table in some specific way or some other rubbish.
This is POP body language–a bit like pop psychology. It’s low-brow bullshit and it harms people who believe in it.
I told Misses Y not to worry, explaining that there are many different things that her husband’s body language could mean.
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