The Bizarre Body Language Of Shy Guys And Girls


Shy guys and shy girls can be the hardest people to understand. They don’t talk to anyone. They never open up about their feelings. And if you ask them a personal question they’ll run a mile. Trust me, I know, I was insufferably shy for 15 years of my life (“Hi, Paul,” people would say as I quickly ran away from them, lest I might be forced to actually say something. Sigh.)

Shy people don’t speak. So the only thing you’ve got to go on is their body language. But even their body language is confusing. The problem is that shy guy body language so closely resembles disinterested body language. Shy guys and girls can seem  disinterested even when they’re totally smitten with you. For instance, consider this example:  a shy guy looks at a girl he’s attracted to then suddenly looks away.

Many women would take this to mean he doesn’t like her, which is what this body language would mean for most guys, with shy people  it actually means the opposite: the guy is interested but afraid to show it. So, what are we left with with shy people? No words. Next to no communication. Confusing body language. But don’t worry. Having been a shy person for long, I know how they work, and I’m about to share everything I know with you!


shy-guy-body-languageOkay, so the body language of shy people can be confusing. But let’s not allow that to get our spirits down. Let’s go ahead and look at precisely what we can determine from the o’ so confusing body language of shy people.


Shy People’s Body Language Gestures 

Gaze: The gaze used in shy guy body language is the opposite of usual body language. A shy guy who is attracted to a girl will look at her often but will also look away anytime he’s spotted. To read shy guy body language by gazes, pay less attention to the actual gaze length (the length of time he / she looks at you in one go) and more attention to the number of times you spot him / her looking at you. In other words, if he’s looking at you often but always looks away anytime you look at himhe almost certainly likes you a lot. 


Dilated Eyes: This is one body language tell that will stay the same for a shy guy as for other people.  A shy guy or shy girl’s eyes will still dilate when they look at someone they like. If his pupils get larger when he looks at you, he’s attracted to you.


Smile: A shy guy will smile at someone they like but with a tight smile (their lips are held tightly together). This is caused by the fact that the shy person is happy to see the person they like, but afraid to open their mouth and speak. This can make them look as though they’re being secretive, where in fact their shyness is forcing them to keep their feelings secret. He can’t open his mouth because he is afraid to start talking, so he holds hits lips closed tight.


Turned Head Rather than Body: Confident people turn their whole body to face someone they’re attracted to when looking from a distance, but the shy guy / shy-mangirl will only turn their head while their body remains pointing elsewhere. Usually, their body will point to an exit.

Think about it like this. His head is saying, “Holy cow, she’s hot,” while his body is saying, “I’m scared let’s get the hell out of here.”

Forming Barriers: One thing I used to do all the time when I was shy was to form a barrier on the opposite side of the person I fancied.

This is a little hard to explain, but imagine the shy guy / girl is standing at a bar and you are on their left hand side. They’ll create a barrier to their right often by putting their hand up to their face. This stops people on their right from being able to see them while they can still look at you.

Essentially, their body language is saying, “I’m going to check her out, but I need to make sure no one’s watching.


Looking at you Through Objects: In order to allow themselves to look at you inconspicuously, the shy girl / guy will often put an object in between their line of sight and you.  For instance, if you’re at a bar, they’ll hold their glass high while drinking, so that they can look at you (through the glass) without  being caught.

Do you see how flipping complex the life of a shy person is?!


Okay, so we’ve looked at some of the most important facts of the body language of shy people. But this has just been a quick introductory blast.

I’m going to be complete honest. Dating shy people is not easy. I’m told it’s not easy by women who apparently used to be attracted to me when I was terribly shy. I never even knew they were attracted to me because I was so terrified of human interaction.

Being shy sucks. But the thing is, shy people rock, once you get to know them. They’re great. They’re caring, nice, decent people (for the most part). That’s why I personally want to make it easier for people to start dating shy guys and girls. Because my own time as a shy guy SUCKED.

I want you to get a date with your shy guy or girl. That’s why I’ve written a complete guide to dating shy people. It’s called Getting Past Hello: Your Guide To Dating Mr or Mrs Shy.  

In it you’ll find:

  • Complete guide to dating shy guys and girls
  • Guide to body language.
  • Secret tricks guaranteed to make that shy guy or shy girls yours

The book is available on all formats (PC, Mac, iPhone, Kindle, Android), specifically so that you can refer to it when you’re around Mr or Mrs Shy.



CURRENTLY: $1.99 until January 1st.













I like to think my writing expresses who I am. I'm a deep, compassionate, visionary author and journalist, known for producing in-depth articles that offer alternative opinions. An actor, writer, and author, I have an eclectic range of interests, from interactive media to spirituality. What holds me together and motivates me is the belief that every day is an opportunity to enlighten and entertain.

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